Veteran’s Day/Liberation Day Sale

what a week…

So much has been going on in my life. Been a whirlwind of emotions, exhaustion, highs, lows, and everything in between..

Personally and professionally.

I have gotten respectful “feedback” about emailing people my personal stuff when this is supposed to be purely a “marketing” email.

It’s wierd becuase, I actually don’t ever remember labeling myself that way or even remotely ever ONLY emailing marketing stuff.

If I have been emailing you previous to 2018, you might know that I have been an open book throughout my whole journey…

Including personal things such as when we got rental scammed and had the police come banging on the door and throwing me and my little family out in the rain back in North Carolina…

Or when I shared when I moved back to Sacramento to help my Dad bury his baby sister…

And even shared when I proposed to my lovely Sisi and we got married on the beach…

So… marketing email?  I guess.  I will do my civic duty and from now on stay on task.

And I will leave my personal stuff and blabbing to my blog if that is what you prefer….

But I digress…

That was not the point of this email. This email was to honor the Veterans here in the United States and across the entire world. Today is the day we take the time to show them the respect they deserve to get 365 days a year…. but I won’t even get started on that rant… (enough with the digressions)

Just so happens share my Liberation day – The day I “retired” and broke free from the system and quit my corporate job.

I usually take the time to celebrate it and doing something fun and make a big ol fuss about it.

But, can you believe it…

with all the aforementioned crap going on in my tiny little world right now…

I actually forgot!!!!!

Yep, it was yesterday. And I didn’t even remember

11/10/07

That a the day (I said) I would never forget….

It has been 11 years now that I have been unemployed!

11 YEARS!

I had no idea what I was doing or where this journey would take me. There was no way I could prepare for things like getting robbed the very first day when we moved to the Virgin Islands, or, being from California, being terrified as we braced ourselves for Hurricane Sandy weeks after we moved to New York.

So many things have happend, I am just so dang ol grateful that I truly get choked up remembering all these things.

I know last year which was the decade year I did a sale to celebrate so I thought I would do the same.

Typically what I do is pic a single product and discount it for a few days for the sale…

But I know not everyone is at the same state and want the same things…

So this year I have put everything up on my school and giving a 75% off coupon for any and all classes you choose.

And if I forgot one and you remember it, email me the name of it and I will create it for you

Just use the coupon code: LIBERATIONDAY

at checkout and see the discount applied

This will be available for 3 days only and then the coupon code will expire

My hope is that it will help you to make a life long lasting change that you will be celebrating for years to come as well…

I would like to be a part of that change..

Let’s make it happen

http://school.coachcomeback.com/courses

P. James “11-10-07” Holland
Coach Comeback

ps. I also saw one of those “6 years ago today” videos on facebook where I posted a video of us totally freaking out because my first ever tornado was barreling towards us.  If you are connected with me on Facebook, just send me a message and I will forward it to you

Help – I fell into a hole

…. but it isn’t my fault……………

========
Recently I was reminded of a story I heard by the great late Dr. Wayne W. Dyer.

He met a lady who, while at an event, was told to write the chapters of her life in 5 chapters.

Stop me if you know this story…..

…..

No?   Great. I will continue

They were only given small cards to write on so it would not get too lenghty.

What follows is the story of her life in 5 chapters

Enjoy

============

THERE’S A HOLE IN MY SIDEWALK
Autobiography in Five Short Chapters

Chapter One
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost …. I am helpless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

Chapter Two
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend that I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in this same place.
But, it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

Chapter Three
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in … it’s a habit … but, my eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

Chapter Four
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

Chapter Five
I walk down another street.

=========

What chapter are you on?

When Is The Perfect Time To Give Up

Nothing is working when you have tried it all

There’s comfort when you bang your head on the wall

Spinning in circles until you are dizzy and sick

You just want to scream at the world “SUCK MY …. THICK…
THUMB”, and go put like a baby

Today is the day I give up…. Maybe.

Seems to make since to end this suffering

So much more worse than Netflix buffering

So when is better time, one better than now

To give up on your dreams and run like a mad cow

…..

…..

 

NEVER!

 

 

Burn the Fuck Up!

Are you familiar with the Mythology or Legend of the Phoenix bird?  It is a powerful symbol.

One that I have permanently etched in ink on my arm actually.

I never really show it. But I stare at it often.

It is for me. A reminder….

 

ancient-origins.netThe Phoenix in Egyptian, Arab, & Greek Mythology of the long-lived bird, “When it feels its end approaching, it builds a nest with the finest aromatic woods, sets it on fire, and is consumed by the flames. From the pile of ashes, a new Phoenix arises, young and powerful. It then embalms the ashes of its predecessor in an egg of myrrh, and flies to the city of the Sun, Heliopolis, where it deposits the egg on the altar of the Sun God.”

Ancient Symbolism of the Magical Phoenix

The mythical phoenix has been incorporated into many religions, signifying eternal life, destruction, creation and fresh beginnings. Click here to read the full story ancient-origins.net

 

Sometimes, when thinks arn’t working out as they should, or  maybe you need a change, sometimes you just gotta burn the fuck up!

There is a saying that goes something like “you can’t steal second base while keeping one foot on first”. If you know American baseball you will get the reference.

Sometimes we are looking for change but still want to hold on to the thing we are trying to change.

It doesn’t work very well does it?

You gotta go all or nothing for true lasting impact!

Set that shit ablaze … you will be surprised at what emerges from the ashes

 

Get A Ranch Keg To Get Any Party Started This Holiday Season

people.com

I already know what you are thinking…

“How can I get VIP access to Kaiser Permanente’s Express Emergency room this holiday season?”

Well Hidden Valley Has just the thing for you!

Hidden Valley Is Selling Ranch Dressing Kegs Now

Hidden Valley has outdone themselves, offering a 5-liter keg full of all the ranch dressing your heart could possibly conjure up.

Preloaded with what they consider “a year’s worth” of the creamy sauce, it’s the perfect gift for the person in your life who puts ranch on literally everything. The company thought through preserving its product, too—until the bitter end. On their site it says the keg is lined with a special FDA approved coating, keeping it tasting fresh until it’s gone. ….. read more people.com

https://i.imgur.com/QJuRCZ8.jpg

LIBERATION DAY SPECIAL – Limited

LIBERATION DAY SPECIAL –

Lifetime Access to TSRW and a full month of personal Coaching

 

I am breaking my silence…

this has gone on long enough

But I can’t hold my tongue any longer

I have been doing this in silence because I just hate having to explain it or the instant judgment that comes with what I am about to tell you…

But if we are to stay connected, It is not like me to shy away from personal stuff that I share.

And I have lost that. I have not been writing to you because a lot has been going on.

But I promise to be a better mentor, advisor, positive influence and dare I say.. friend and write to you more often.

But here goes…

Ready…?

I am Vegan!!!

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!?!!?

I love vegans memeHave been for over a year now. My wife Sisi, started earlier and it’s closer to 2 years for her. I was “afraid” to put that label on it so I wasn’t keeping track of an exact date when it happened.

When offered, I would just politely decline the meals and say I would get my own food later without giving a reason.

As soon as you say you are vegan I get questions like…

“So.. are you like… a hippie?”

“Are you going to become a bra-burning activist?”

and the every so hated…

“But… where do you get your protein from bro?”

AAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I will be sharing more about the struggle (it’s real), the reasons behind the transition and why I want to punch most of my friends and family square in the back of their foreheads all in coming emails/blogs…

Yep.. you heard me.. BLOG!!!

I am going back to one of my abandoned loves. WRITING!

It might just read like a 14-year-old girls diary, filled with crushes and fashion crisises’s…

But I will be writing again.

I have so much more to tell you

What do vegans eat imageP. James “found love in a hopeless place” Holland
Real Estate CPR
also known as Coach Comeback… sometimes

Wifi Hotspots Can Be Dangerous

Was at my neighborhood wifi hotspot last night. Went to my normal quiet place to connect.
This place is nice. It’s super quiet. No annoying barrista’s yelling out the wrong names every 14 seconds to sizes of drinks that make no sense whatsoever
No. I found a golden little undiscovered gem. Dang near completely isolated. Lots of empty tables and places to plug in.
Would actually have more space it the place didn’t also double as a self-storage.
They have endless racks of useless old junk covered in mounds of dust.
Seems no one really knows why the junk is there. But they make a point to keep it tidy and organized anyway.
Everything was going great except for last night.
Last night there was a disturbance and my hotspot.
Apparently someone tried to steal something from the storage.
He claimed he was a member of the warehouse and was allowed to “BORROW” stuff from time to time.
He seemed official to be honest.
He had a badge that he swiped and seemed to logically make note of the materials he was trying to borrow.
But since none of the workers had ever seen anyone with such clearance or anyone every try to leave with anything, you can imagine why they panicked.
So upon checking out a physical book from the storage and trying to leave the library… he was immediate arrested.
Investigation pending

11 DISD schools are losing their librarians because of budget cuts … – Dallas News (blog)

https://www.dallasnews.com/news/education/2017/04/17/facing-big-budget-cuts-librarians-get-boot-almost-dozen-dallas-isd-schoolsAmong them are four high schools — Roosevelt, Lincoln, A. Maceo Smith New Tech and Gilliam Collegiate Academy. So are three middle schools in the district’s … 11 DISD schools are losing their librarians because of budget cuts … – Dallas News (blog)

 

Best Ted Talk: How To Beat Procrastination With The Panic Monster

The whole appeal of this Ted Talk is held extensively in the images. So if you are listening to the audio, you may want to follow the link back to the blog and watch it fully.

And if you are already on the blog… Welcome. All you must do is scroll down and watch it here

[ted id=2458]

First of all, I want to curse the monkey. But lets be honest. How could anyway stay mad at a cute little monkey?

Especially one that brings fun and good cheer.

http://media0.giphy.com/media/yV5iknckcXcc/giphy.gif

So really, the problem is that damn panic monster. If we can find a way to just get rid of him completely, and all the responsibilites he is trying to force us to take, then all will be right in the world again.

KILL THE MONSTER!!! Who’s with me?

 

 

Why Procrastinators Procrastinate

waitbutwhy.comWho would have thought that after decades of struggle with procrastination, the dictionary, of all places, would hold the solution. I would do those the night before, until I realized I could just do them through the night, and I did that until I realized I could actually start them in the early morning on the day they were due. This behavior reached caricature levels when I was unable to start writing my 90-page senior thesis until 72 hours before it was due, an experience that ended with me in the campus doctor’s office learning that lack of blood sugar was the reason my hands had gone numb and curled up against my will. Via waitbutwhy.com

 

How To Get Someone’s Attention – And Keep It!

 

How to Deliver Criticism So Employees Pay Attention

Strategies for coaching athletes don’t always work for executives trying to manage employees. But when it comes to delivering criticism, I do think some best practices translate. Used correctly, criticism can improve performance, enhance trust and respect, and advance the achievement of mutual goals. Used incorrectly, it can be toxic to a relationship.

 

Engage the person in a specific solution. All too often managers offer criticism in general terms, leaving the receiver to guess what remedy is expected.

Link the criticism to what’s most important to the employee. My coach knew I wanted to please my parents.

 

After all, they sacrificed a lot to allow me to pursue my dream of one day being in the Olympics. So, during diving workouts, if I was goofing off, all my coach had to say to get me focused was, “Do you think what you are doing right now is going to make your parents proud of you and get you into the Olympics?” How to Deliver Criticism So Employees Pay Attention

Cardone ZoneThis week on my show Cardone Zone I talked about the importance of ATTENTION to growing your business, your sales revenue and your brand. Attention is the Holy Grail of all business activities and the number one activity I am focused on this year to expand my business.For the full show you can go to GrantCardone.com/CardoneZone What do I mean when I am talking about attention? I am talking about enough attention that you and your company own the market.A&E tried to dump Pat Robertson of Duck Dynasty for his in your face commitment to family values, his and religious beliefs. They failed to dump him because 11 million viewers (attention) said NO.Attention is the first STEP to growing your business, the first step to getting your products into marketplaceAnd the single biggest problem for all entrepreneurs who want to grow their business. Over the last 5 years I have worked very hard to get the right kind of attention. I have used radio, tv, advertising and social media. Over the last five years we posted over 1000 videos on you tube, and tens of thousand of blogs, strategies, and post on other social mediums.

My Pizza Guy Is An Asshole!

I know it!

You know it!

But nobody has enough nads to say anything about it. 

He’s sleazy, pushy, aggressive, and just downright scum. Just like all “salesmen” right?

That is why no one ever wants to be known as a salesman… Because of guys like the pizza man!

Tell me if this scenario sounds familiar…

 

Pizza Pusher:Would you like to add a soup or salad to that order?

Me:umm no

Pizza Pusher:Would you like to add buffalo wings, they are on special?

Me:Ok, sure

Pizza Pusher:Probably going to need drinks to wash it down, can I add a couple 2 Liters to the order?

Me: *sigh* Ok

Pizza Pusher:We also have garlic bread just fresh out of the oven.

Me: Well you GOTTA have garlic bread… if it’s fresh right? Sure, add a few.

Pizza Pusher:You know, for just $3 more you can make it an extra large and get 33% more pizza.

Me:Well that sounds reasonable. I’d be LOSING money if I didn’t

Pizza Pusher:Great. Would you also like to make it a double meat for just $4 more?

Me:I’m too committed now…Why not?

Pizza Pusher:Fantastic. Would you also like to sign up for direct deposit of all your future checks on payday?

Me:Sounds good.

—–
If you ask me, he is one sleazy bastard. I just went in there to play Terminator 2 Pinball machine and I end up signing up for their 401k Dough for Dough benefits package!

And yet, when it comes to me offering one of my many products or services to business professionals… there is immediate resistance.

Because no one wants to be known as a “salesman” but want to sell their stuff

Sounds kind of crazy! We want what we want but don’t want what is required to obtain the wanting stuffs.

See if this scenario also hits home a bit:

Me: Hey I have this really great product or service.

Me: Well.. it’s not that great. I mean, it’s ok.

Also Me: You might like it, you might not. Either is ok.

Still Me:I would like you to buy it. But is ok if you don’t.

Forever Me:Am I being to pushy?

Sadly… still Me: You know what… never mind. You probably don’t need it. Forget I said anything. Please like me.

—-

It’s just absurd.

On the other hand, the pizza guy has no problem being a sleazy salesman…

So why doesn’t the pompous pizza pusher feel bad about making known everything he has to offer you at every chance he gets?

Why do you?

i'm not crazy

I am NOT a Sellout!

I try hard everyday just like you.

I give my all to every situation

And yet… sometimes.. I do the unthinkable

I do NOT Sell out!

Before the holidays I conducted a new class.

It was a unique way to pursuade (sell) anything to anyone in any situation…

Yeah.. it can work for just about any situation where you need to be more effective in your “convincing”.

Need to get the kids to eat their split pea soup? Take this class

Would like to have more clients/leads into your pipeline? Take this class

Want to effective get your husband to sit through the new hit movie musical “La La Land”…. ummm… buy him a beer and promise him he can throw a superbowl party at your house in a few weeks…

oh and also... take this class!

But it gets even sweeter…

I actually tried to giveaway 250 copies.

I guess everyone was busy with sugarplums dancing in their heads…

Anyway, I had taken the offer away and then raised the price. So now it has been for sale.

But since I never actually sold out of my free copies…

I am putting the remaining ones back up for grabs!

So… go here now and get the class for free

And even if you don’t, it will still be worth the low low price if you miss your chance for a free one…

Enjoy

P. James “still tis the season” Holland
Coach Comeback

The Perfect Pitch

ps. Still reading?!?!?!?! Didn’t I just say there are limited free copies? Go register now while you can still snag it for nothing, THEN come back to see my inspiration, often humorous image trademark ending to my emails

= =

==

===

Bob Ross everybody needs a friend

[Gift 2 of the season giveaways] More time this time

If you missed my previous email with gift 1 of the season, I explained that I am going to be giving stuff away up until Christmas

Well the first gift was all out within about 4 minutes of me sending the email.

Which is why I said you need to read my emails and read them fast.

Well even with the rules in place, I got quite a few emails telling me that it wasn’t fair. Or that they dont check emails at work or during supper or whatever.

So I promised that I would vary the times I send the gifts out since I typically always write at night and send emails late.

I would also vary the way you can get them and make it fun

So this time I just learned how to do an amazon “giveaway”

This is my first time ever using it … but so far I like it.

This time i set up multiple gifts and I set it to a drawing through amazon so the winner is random.

It’s pretty cool and I like it. So I will be doing several through this.

And I also plan to make the gifts increasingly better the closer we get to Christmas.

Why would I do this you ask?

Purely selfish reasons of course.

I want you to read my emails!

OBVIOUSLY!

Sometimes I write and plan for hours to create something of value for you. And I’m a sensitive guy. …

How do you think it makes me feel to see that you never even opened it?

You didn’t think about that at all, did you?

NOPE!

See, you’re selfish too. So we can be pals 🙂

Anyway, more to come

Go to my first of many amazon giveaways and try to win gift number 2

https://giveaway.amazon.com/p/078416c4f76adf06

P. James “Ho HO HO” Holland
Coach Comeback

[Gift 1 of the season giveaways] Let the games begin – you gotta be quick

Every time I send you an email from now til Christmas, it will contain some sort of gift.

BUT….

It WILL be limited.

It will either be TIME SENSITIVE. Like a self destructing gift that is removed after 1 hour of being sent.

Or maybe a limited gift (like this one) that is a book I purchased myself and select the “gift” option in amazon and it gives me a code to give a way. So in that case it goes to whoever is the first to redeem it.

Or it might be one where I ask a riddle or something and the first person to respond with the correct answer gets whatever I am giving away.

Either way it will be something fun. Or my attempt at something fun. Or something that entertains me in some way… because that what the holidays are all about right?

NOTE:I send my emails out to a couple thousand of my contacts. So you have to be pretty quick when you read my emails. My best suggestion is to set up an email rule or an alert so you are notified on your computer AND mobile the second I send you something.

Just a tip 😉

So this is gift 1 for the holiday season

It is a copy of one of my books found here on Amazon

Once there, when you go to purchase, there is an option in the right column that says “enter promotional code or gift code”

Enter this: (enable images if you cannot see the code below)

enable images for code
Another, more stern, note: If you do not plan on immediately using (reading, in this case) said gift and putting it into action, OR, you already own it, please leave it for someone else to use. Some people (not you) will take any and all gifts just for the sake of getting something

Not you…. of course.

If you did not make it in time, worry not. I have many more to come, so maybe you will get something even COOLER in the next email.

In the meantime you can listen to the latest podcast where I pretty much self-deprecate the entire time my own personal disgust with myself. I’m a work in progress…

Podcast here: I think I hate Myselfie

http://coachcomeback.com/am-i-being-to-synical-here/

P. James “also kinda sorta back on facebook” Holland
Coach Comeback

Investor CPR

ps. I really do want to make this fun, so I am open to suggestions for any other gift ideas. Just ask

pps. And now here is an inspirational quote… with a bit of my type of humor. Because if you can’t enjoy a little inspiration…. then you are probably a Nazi… in which case, you likely wont like much of anything I say. Which would be confusing as to why a Nazi that doesn’t like me is reading my email, or even knows how to read email, or has opposable thumbs

Am I being to synical here?

Things like this make me feel like I hate myself sometimes.

Weird to have such strong feelings about a group that I am … technically classified in.

More like an utter disdain. Well Trevor helps me cope with these issues and self hate during this weeks podcast. http://realestatecpr.com

 

 

 

Click to Schedule an Appointment

007: How your carpet could qualify you to GURUdom w/ Trevor Emdon the Wizard of Wisdom

Who knew that carpet held the key to life improvement?

Oh, You didn’t know being an expert in carpets qualifies someone to be an expert in your personal life?

That is covered in today’s podcast along with:

  • What do you keep above your fold (not as dirty as you think)
  • They proper beard to have for selling garden landscaping
  • How to properly buy a random girl a drink and when you can immediately ask for sex
  • How to grow your business and how to sell anything to anyone (but no worries, we quickly gloss over these)
  • and most importantly… The history behind Trevor’s funny little accent

Oh yes, this podcast has it all

 

how to be a pirate

 

Women wins $43mil jackpot and ends up $2 bucks to show for it

No, she didn’t blow it all on books and Thunder From Down Under lifetime passes like I would have.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9OpH8kLNWnQ

Some things just don’t go your way when you have no proof.

To be fair, the casino’s are designed to make sure no one every REALLY wins…

SO when I found out what they did to her, I wasn’t really shocked.

Woman Wins $43 Million Slot Machine Jackpot — But All She Got Was Meat | Huffington Post

An unemployed mother of four says she is suing Resorts World Casino in Queens, New York City, after a slot machine indicated she won $43 million ― but all she got was a steak dinner.

“I feel like they did me real dirty,” Katrina Bookman told the New York Daily News in a story published Wednesday. ….. continue reading huffingtonpost.com

 

This poor sap bits the big jackpot on the penny slots (oh the irony) for 43mil. Already taking selfies with the machine, gave her boss a virtual kick in the ass and already purchasing plane tickets and an Uber to leave the husband and kids for some unnamed island.

Only to have the management come over and discover (after some sort of undisclosed inspection) that she didn’t actually win and it was just a glitch.

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaatt?!?!?!

I thought that is part of the rule – if the cherries line up, the thing dings and screen flashes your life before your eyes… you are a winner right?

Nope, She got $2.25 to take home after it was all said and done.

You can read the rest of the story here

So what would you do? Does she have any rights? Or should she just be happy she still has kneecaps?

Fair if it is a legitimate machine glitch or would you fight this and get your money?

 

 

Quote – The End Of The Day

“It’s never too late to start over. If you weren’t happy with yesterday, try something different today. Don’t stay stuck, do better.”

Easier said than done. Sometimes you think wht you did was really productive and it isn’t until much later you realize nothing you did today even mattered towards your ream goal.

Happens to me often. A lot more lately. I fell like I worked my tail to the bone all afternoon . . Only to look back and realize cheering for the Eagles is a full time job

006: Trophy Hot? With Comedian Amy Miller

Talk about loving what you do…

This interview with Comedian Amy Miller is a good healthy reminder of why that love should in everything that you do, or every person, depending on the cost.

In this interview you will hear what it is like in the sometimes brutal but often hilarious and non-stop fun of being in comedy.

It is NOT for the weak.

And Amy Miller is anything but!

Amy Miller is a fast-rising talent on the West Coast and national scene. Originally from Oakland, California Amy found her comedy chops in the Bay Area scene and is still a favorite at the San Francisco Punch Line and Cobb’s Comedy Club. After a move to Portland, Amy quickly rose to the top of the Northwest comedy scene, winning Portland’s Funniest Comedian in Helium Comedy Club’s contest, as well as being voted Portland’s Funniest 2013 and 2015 in the Willamette Week. Amy was a breakout favorite in Season 9 of Last Comic Standing. Roseanne Barr called her “a star” and a “contender for next alpha female comedian.” Keenen Ivory Wayans said she had one of the “fiercest jokes he had ever heard.” Amy is currently in Portland being alpha and fierce and getting rained on, but works comedy clubs and festivals around the country, working with headliners from Norm Macdonald to Arsenio Hall to singer Ryan Adams.

– Last Comic Standing Semi-Finalist, Season 9
– Winner, Portland’s Funniest Person, Helium Comedy Club
– San Francisco Sketchfest
– Bridgetown Comedy Festival
– Riot LA Festival
– Doug Loves Movies
– NPR’s Marketplace
– The Bennington Show
– Put Your Hands Together with Cameron Esposito and Rhea Butcher

Press and Mentions and Stuff!

Amy Miller vs. Aries Spears, Willamette Week

KATU: AM Northwest with Doug Benson: Video

Oregonian: Amy Miller makes a big Impact on Last Comic Standing

Street Roots: Amy Miller is in Control

Future of What/ KillRockStars: Is Comedy the New Punk Rock?

Portland Mercury: Amy Miller Named Portland’s Funniest Person

OPB: Amy Miller on the Dark Side of Portland’s Comedy Scene

Axs.com Could This Be The Best Last Comic Standing Season Yet?

Carter Matt: Last Comic Standing Review July 2015

WWeek: Amy Miller Wins Portland’s Funniest Person, July 2015

Meet Amy Miller, Corvallis Gazette Times

OPB: What’s Funny About Daytime TV?

Willamette Week follows me to more than one house show. 1/15/15

NPR’s Marketplace, 12/6/2014

News Whistle Q&A 11/2014

Fresh Meat #2 w/ Peter Ellenby, Willamette Week 9/24/2014

Funemployment Radio, 9/23/2014

Fresh Meat #1 w/ Curtis Cook, Willamette Week 9/17/2014

The Hustle: Three Nights in the Life of Stand-Up Amy Miller, Portland Mercury 8/27/2014

Tucson Weekly: Amy Miller on Comedy, Dads, and Dogs in Vests June 2014

The Portland Tribune: A Laugh Riot 5/1/2014

Willamette Week: The Funniest Five 11/20/2013

The Wandering Wolf/ Yoni Wolf’s Podcast 10/2013

East Bay Express: A Funny Hustle for Sylvan Productions ½/2012

Willamette Week: Comic Amy Miller Explains Portland Comedy’s Booms and Busts 10/2/2013

Wonder and Risk: Q&A 10/2013

Do We Really Need Women Only Festivals? 10/16/2013

Serial Optimist: Local Comics Know Why Portland is So Great 10/17/2013

Funny is Pretty (An Interview) 2/2014

When Your Mouth And Your Mind Heard Two Different Questions – EPICFAIL

I understand it is a ton of pressure being in the spotlight constantly.

By that I mean I don’t understand at all. No on ever looks at me with interest.

But for this beauty pageant contestant… things go a bit differently when asked a very serious and disturbing question.

“….. statistics show that 1 out of 5 Americans cannot point out the USA on a world map…….”

Here is what happened next

 

WHAT DID SHE JUST SAY??? 🙈👀 Painful to watch… But can’t stop watching it ♨️♨️

A video posted by P James Holland (@coachcomeback) on

 

Ummmm… I will leave it to you to decipher that one

I’m Hiring and Intern – Comes with Keys To The Kindgom

I’m hiring. I want a full time person I can count on on my team. If this sounds like you, listen to the audio and follow the instructions and we shall talk soon.

NEW: After Hours Treat To Celebrate Disneland’s Magic Kingdom 25th Anniversary For Lovebirds

Now the happiest place on earth and the saddest place on earth can collide

You Can Now Get Married at the Magic Kingdom After Hours And It’s Totally Magical

https://style.disney.com/news/2016/10/10/you-can-now-get-married-at-the-magic-kingdom-after-hours-and-its-totally-magical/Having your wedding at the Magic Kingdom is basically every fairy tale fan’s dream come true. Earlier this year, Disney Weddings announced that ceremonies could now take place in the East Plaza Garden in front of Cinderella Castle, which we were totally thrilled about. And now, Disney Weddings revealed their newest wedding locale and it goes without saying that it’s all kinds of enchanting. Click here to read the full story style.disney.com

 

I mean, getting married is already strange enough to manage because nothing ever goes as planned. Now throw in a princess, glass slippers and an alchol restriction and I see nothing but problems headed your way.

Could get exciting really fast.

“Hey beast, get on over here an ring my bell and turn my clock” Belle says.

“Um, would love to, but you should probably save that for the groom”

To many masks and costumes. How are you supposed to know who is who? And hyperventilating is always a risk at any wedding. More so when you are wearing a 79lb mask.

Sounds like the better plan would have been to setup late night Magical divorce packages.

Now THAT is a party I would go to. At least everyone will be happy.

The water gun squirt competition could have pictures of the mother in law on it.

The tea cups could be filled with booze.

And the Happiest place on earth could keep it’s reputation in tact.

 

Couples can have a magical after-hours wedding at Magic Kingdom – Local 10

http://www.local10.com/theme-parks/couples-can-now-have-magical-after-hours-wedding-at-magic-kingdomThe exclusive access does come with a price. The Magic Kingdom Park After-Hours Experience wedding starts at $180,000. That’s a lot of Mickey Bars. Disneyland in California already offers the after-hours wedding package starting at $100,000 in front of …Her.ieDisney’s Fairy Tale Weddings & Honeymoons Couples can have a magical after-hours wedding at Magic Kingdom – Local 10

 

 

 

 

Having Trouble With The Order of Things

Today I had to go to the store to get a pair of scissors.

Then, when we tried to open them, we realized we needed scissors to open them

They are in a bulletproof pack. Commercial grade plastic. Built to outlast roaches and Twinkies.

So which comes first? The Chicken or the Egg?

Do you buy the scissors to open the scissor pack?

Such is life

 

You’re Not Crazy – Women Have Superpowers

And here you thought you’re girl was just some sort of ninja!

Well… You’re right. They kind of all are.

women remember everything imageWhy Men Never Remember and Women Never Forget: Surprising Findings from The New Science of Gender-Specific Medicine

“Men and women think differently, approach problems differently, emphasize the importance of things differently, and experience the world around us through entirely different lenses,” says Marianne J. Here are some of the significant differences in the brain structure and function she describes in the books:The Anterior Cingulate Cortex weighs options and makes decisions. It’s the worry-wort center, and it’s larger in women than men. The Medial Preoptic Area is the area for sexual pursuit. It’s 2.5 times larger in the male.

Women have a higher rate of blood flow to parts of the brain associated with memory.  According to Dr. Marianne Legato, M.D., “This is one of the reasons researchers give for the overwhelming evidence that women have better immediate and delayed recall of the spoken word.”  Women’s higher levels of estrogen also helps with memory.  “Higher levels of it are associated with improved learning and memory,” says Dr. Legato, “and this may be why women are better at these tasks. Why Men Never Remember and Women Never Forget: Surprising Findings from The New Science of Gender-Specific Medicine

 

Veteran’s Day/Liberation Day Sale

what a week... So much has been going on in my life. Been a whirlwind of emotions, exhaustion, highs, lows, and everything in between.. Personally and...