Top 10 Funniest/Stupid Things Karl Pilkington Has Ever Said


Publish Author and humorist. Vagabonding around the world. Successfully unemployed for 9 years. Showing you how to do the same... minus the vagabond part... I mean... unless that is your thing. To learn how it all started and what allowed me this woderfuld life ...  click here now

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57 Responses

  1. thefartydoctor says:

    Re: kitten, I think Steve should encourage him more just to work Ricky up haha

  2. ChampionAbec says:

    @slhrfeq yeah i totally agree! BUT! ive been wasting my time with this game all day have a look its tight => tr.im4glwc

  3. whatDflip says:


  4. ARemedyFrosty says:

    He’s on a script.

  5. MrInfoRevolution says:

    It’s still halarious

  6. AcousticAppraisal says:

    Karl Pilkington is hilarious and doesn’t even realize it.

  7. slimmedirk says:

    Yes that’s what mainstream historians tell us but that doesnt make it fact;


  8. slimmedirk says:

    A mathematician called in and told them Karl was right and Ricky was wrong, but that didnt stop Ricky from proclaiming he was still right and Karl was wrong.

  9. Thomas Aitken says:

    I think at times he can just be stupid but a lot of the time he just has problems articulating his thoughts

  10. Tony Cracknell says:

    are you serious….if that’s true the human prints came after the dinosaur prints. Because they are next to each other doesn’t mean that they occured at the same time… dinosaurs went extinct around 60 million years before humans.

  11. Descartes Rene says:

    Name one! The infinite monkey theorem works by definition. Just because your brain cannot comprehend the theorem, it doesn’t therefore follow that it is not true. Nobody understands quantum mechanics – but that doesn’t make it false. Rather than spouting ad hominem attacks, why don’t you actually try and demonstrate it is false? I dare you. And I will be waiting to hear which so called “professors” have “debunked” it – you’re an idiot. Play a record!

  12. hc1153 says:

    whoa calm down there buddy

  13. MDassassin1907 says:


  14. Dante Viperion says:


  15. Lukas High says:

    your so far off the mark its unreal….

  16. Lukas High says:

    you do not even understand what infinity is so shut the fuck up many people disagree with the infinite typewriter point. it isn’t as simple as to say infinity and think you win. Twat

  17. Lukas High says:

    no he isn’t i have seen multiple professors completely debunk the infinite type writer point. so seriously fuck yourself

  18. Lukas High says:

    there are human racks found next to dinosaur tracks in Texas… don’t dismiss everything.

  19. Solvebouvin says:

    Karl looks a bit like Lars Ulrich from Metallica

  20. CameraRollFilms says:

    I would kindly like to refer you to 8:19.

  21. Craig St. Cyr says:

    Jesus, Ricky. Step back from the mic when you laugh, mate.

  22. Sarah S says:

    Karl is a genius in stupidity.

  23. DaTrip2warez says:

    Karl cracks me up, but it’s awesome to laugh along with Ricky.

  24. Gangrel Beckett says:

    I hope Karl is at least friendly.

  25. Derandin Darrow says:

    if we sent gir to Afghanistan :/

  26. lo12la100 says:

    CUPCAKES are always better than going home.

  27. holy-terrorist platinium says:

    Holy-Terrorist:>*=* 3:11!

  28. katherinebechter says:

    Lol cute

  29. vanessa19436 says:

    LOL xD

  30. carigan whitney says:


  31. Puffle4255 says:

    XD @laura lovesMCR

  32. Kaylee Buskell says:

    i need tocas or i will explod lolz i would love that to be a phoba i have

  33. Emily V. says:


  34. rachel schick says:

    i gonna huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuug you!!

  35. rachel schick says:

    doomie doomdi doom

  36. Bella Castaneda says:

    I love this show

  37. sharonleemontiel says:

    Meow :3

  38. someone cool says:

    Why is there bacon in the soap? I MADE IT MYSELF

  39. someone cool says:


  40. Hukiolukio says:

    I wanna be the piggy gir loves D’=

  41. 360MegaByte says:


  42. ReshaldSlayer says:


  43. rosiemama11 says:

    Hi floor, make me a sammich ^_^

  44. Laura LovesMCR says:

    Congratulations, everyone has managed to at some point quoted the video purely consisting of quotes. A job well done, none of the rest of would have ever picked up on any of it otherwise. You all deserve a pat on the back and a cookie.

  45. 1Morey says:


  46. Bethany Hayes says:

    WHERE IS, “It’s been nice working with you, Gir! Now, self destruct.” “FINALLY!!! EEHEEHEEHEE!” BOOM WHERE IS IT?!?!?

  47. Tyshaun Randall says:

    cows r my friend

  48. Margarita Morgan says:


  49. Erin says:

    My fave quote: “Your scent, It’s like a drug to me. You’re like my own personal brand of heroine.” LOVE IT!!!! And my fave book is a tie between Eclipse and Breaking Dawn!!!!

  50. Leenee says:

    Jasper? What do vampires do for bachelor parties? You’re not taking him to a strip club, are you? — Bella

    My fave is Breaking Dawn.

  51. Movie Master says:

    “So what are you stalking me now”
    “your on my res. remember?”- jacob (i love him)
    and i LOVE the book eclipse

  52. Fanpire says:

    My favorite book is Breaking Dawn and my favorite quotes are:

    Of all the things about me that could frighten you, you worry about my driving.-Edward Cullen

    Ill be back so soon, you wont have time to miss me. Take care of my heart. I’ve left it with you.-Edward Cullen

    You’ll never catch me betting against Alice.-Bella Swan

  53. Jo W says:

    “Before you, Bella, my life was like a moonless night. Very dark, but there were stars –points of light and reason….And then you shot across my sky like a meteor. Suddenly everything was on fire; there was brilliancy, there was beauty. When you were gone, when the meteor had fallen over the horizon, everything went black. nothing had changed, but my eyes were blinded by light. I couldn’t see the stars anymore. And there was no more reason for anything”

    That’s a beautiful literary metaphor, perfect for a report.

    There’s also the famous “And so the lion fell in love with the lamb.”

    Probably not much use in a report but I love “Oh, a sadistic vampire, intent on torturing her to death, sure, no problem, she runs off to meet him. An IV, on the other hand… ”

    Renee said: “There’s something strange about the way you two are together… the way he watches you- it’s so… protective. like he’s about to throw himself in fromt of a bullet to save you or something”

    and “Sleep, my Bella. Dream happy dreams. You are the only one who has ever touched my heart. It will always be yours. Sleep, my only love. ”
    A sweet Edward quote, totally shows how much he loves her.

    *”No, I don’t want to be without you, Bella, of course not. Be rational. And I have no problem with saving you, either — if it weren’t for the fact that I was the one putting you in danger… that I’m the reason that you’re here.” -Edward Cullen
    *”You are my life. You’re the only thing it would hurt me to lose.” -Bella Swan

    In New Moon:
    *”So maybe this is hell. I don’t care. I’ll take it.” – Edward Cullen
    *”How can I put this so that you’ll believe me? You’re not asleep, and you’re not dead. I’m here, and I love you. I have always loved you, and I will always love you. I was thinking of you, seeing your face in my mind, every second that I was away. When I told you that I didn’t want you, it was the very blackest kind of blasphemy.” – Edward Cullen

    In Eclipse: I have a few faves..
    *”There’s something… strange about the way you two are together… The way he watches you—it’s so… protective. Like he’s about to throw himself in front of a bullet to save you or something.” — Renee Dwyer
    *”Do you ever think that your life might be easier if you weren’t in love with me?” — Edward Cullen
    *”Besides… the more time I spend with you, the more human emotions seem comprehensible to me. I’m discovering that I can sympathize with Heathcliff in ways I didn’t think possible before.” — Edward Cullen

    In Breaking Dawn: my favorite will always be that last line..
    “And then we continued blissfully into this small but perfect piece of our forever.” you can see, I usually like Edward’s lines because they tend to be with deeper meanings! I LOVE IT..


  54. Valeria says:

    New moon i don’t remember exactly how i t goes but i think it says something like
    Edward-“I’ll get you one for x-mas”
    Alice – “yellow”
    it was something like that… but i thought it was so funny how she said it lol I can’t wait to see how she says it in the movie..

    TEAM EDWARD !!!!

  55. Erica says:

    My favorite book is Breaking Dawn

    but my favorite quote is from Twilight “…And third, I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him.”

  56. Stephanie says:

    the best quote by far is edward:”and so the lion fell in love with the lamb”
    bella”what a stupid lamb”
    edwars”what a sick and masochistic lion”

    the first quote i know for sure i dont know about the last one’
    it was beatiful when i read the book and i imagines them saying it to each other, the part in the movie was great as well.

  57. Princess Samatha says:

    My favorite quote is “And so the Lion fell In love with the Lamb. What a stupid lamb. What a sick masochistic lion.” As for my favorite book, I don’t know I can’t pick a favorite I love them all. I also think Stephinie Meyer should make another book, I’m not talking about Midnight Sun by the way, about Jacob and Nessie.

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