What you did wrong is none of YOUR business

May 29, 2012 by P. James Holland

“Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.”

Let go of the past!
It happened!
SO WHAT!
Let it go!
We have all done things that we probably wish we didn’t.
There are times when I want to smack myself the very second after I have blurted something out before my mind actually caught up to what I was saying.
But there is nothing you can do about it!
Every single time you find yourself using the word “should” you will find that your inner dialogue is basically making you feel worse through blame.
When you say you SHOULD HAVE done something, that translates to saying that what you actually did was wrong… so you start to feel bad.
Then, you realize it is in the past so you cannot correct what you have done so you feel even worse!
STOP THAT!
The only power you truly have is in the present moment.
This moment is the only moment you can control. Why not use that power by keeping all of your focus on being present

The Power Of Being Fully Present In The Moment

Power of the Present: We all suffer personal losses and struggle at times to heal. Most of the humanity is in constant pain and grief. You can heal yourself by living in the present.
In the present moment, there is no hurt or pain, as ego digs into the past memories to bring suffering into the present. We are pure joy. In the present moment, there is no anxiety or stress as there is no anticipation or expectation of future. In the present moment, our actions and thoughts come from our highest self, which is divine. Miracles happen in present as the divine works through us. Being in the present moment is a practice and it requires discipline.
Make this practice your daily mantra to heal and discover your divinity for a blissful life.
…..continue reading

When you stop focusing on the present and continue to dwell on the past you might even begin to feel lonely. Like you are facing all your troubles by yourself.
Think about it….
No one can travel back to the past in your head with you. So you end up not even noticing who may be sitting right in front of you to give you a hand.
When there is something “back there” that you just cant help but to think about try these few tricks to help get you back centered.

Steps for bringing your focus back to the present

Get Wet: Water has mysterious powers. Something about it always has a way of instantly bringing you into a place of peace. Take a shower. Run a bath. Jump in a pool… If all else fails, drink a giant glass of ice cold water.
Make Some Noise: This may go against the more appropriate opposite of meditation, but I find when I really have something heavy on my mind it seems like the quieter it gets on the outside, the louder that negative voice gets on the inside. BANG A DRUM. Break a dish (not your own, preferable) Crank up your favorite song and belt along with it.
Get Primitive: Write! You would be surprised at how much focus it takes to actually put pencil to paper and journal out some of those profound thoughts you have. Not texting. No typing. Actual paper and pencil!

One of these methods may work great. Maybe you have some of your own ways of keeping your mind in the present moment.
Just know that you are at your most powerful right now. Only right now.
This moment is fresh and brand new. Will you spend it creating a beautiful lasting memory, or let it be dashed away by yesterday’s debris?

Images provided by:

mydualities.wordpress.com

www.flickr.com

videoproducer.wordpress.com

How To Find Happiness Within Yourself…In All The Wrong Places

May 27, 2012 by P. James Holland

It can sometimes seem like a lifelong journey to learn how to find happiness within yourself. . . But that is not actually the case. . . . if you know where to look….KEEP READING

Did you know that your problems actually hold the key to what will truly make you happy?

How To Find Happiness Within Yourself

So all those desires originated from something that didn’t feel so fab. And desire is what fuels our expansion.

Which means it’s actually a good thing when we run across something we don’t like. It means life is about to get even better!

That is, as long as we don’t stay stuck (i.e. focused) on the crappy problems. Since we get what we focus on, if I’m all panties-in-a-twist about what’s gone wrong, then guaranteed I’m creating more things going wrong.
But when I can appreciate the role this “contrast” has played, knowing that it’s leading to even better things (as long as I don’t overly dwell on the ‘problem’), then life can’t helpbut get better.
So that’s actually two reasons to make friends with what doesn’t seem very nice in life(losing a job, getting dumped, going broke, getting sick, etc.):

The first reason is that it’s what leads to things getting even better than they were before,

and the second reason is that if we don’t make some sort of peace with it, then we get stuck in it!
read more

We NEED to know what we DON’T want in order for what we DO want to become more clear.
Being content is worse than having problems when it comes to your personal growth.
Take the time to asses and welcome your next problem and you might discover you knew how to find happiness within yourself all along.
What are some “problems” that you can look back on and be grateful that you had them?
Remember to Click LIKE below to share this post with your friends of Facebook.

You CAN find happiness at the bottom of a bottle! ACTUAL PROOF!

May 23, 2012 by P. James Holland

I was told that you cannot “drink” you sorrows away.
I heard it was a bad idea to look for comfort at the bottom of a bottle.
Turns out I was, in fact, looking for love in all the RIGHT places . . . . so to speak.
Where can I find such elixers you ask?
Good question!
Whether you are looking for something to pick you up first thing in the morning or recharge your midday work batteries, Men’s Health UK has got you covered

Best Daily Mood Boosting Drinks

[quote style=”boxed”]

8am: Early mood riser

Cranberry smoothie

“Low glucose slows brain function,” says nutritionist Angela Walker. Cranberries are packed with glucose and contain manganese to stabilise blood sugar. Blend a cranberry juice with yoghurt and pumpkin seeds.
Cost Ingredients approx £2.50

10am: Mid-morning energiser

Beetroot juice

Commuting might take the edge off your cheer. Move to the beet to revive it. “Nitrate in beetroot widens blood vessels, boosting oxygen uptake and giving you more energy,” says Walker.
Cost Beet It, £1.65 for 250ml

1pm: Lunchtime booster

Supergreens

“Poor food digestion allows toxins to reach your brain, affecting mood,” says Walker. The probiotics in supergreens counter these toxins. Mix them with tomato juice – which is rich in folic acid and aids mental wellbeing for a double boost.
Cost ProGreens, £22 for 15 sachets

3pm: Afternoon kickstart

Energy powder

The mid-afternoon energy slump can dampen your outlook. So quaff a sachet of Nature’s Plus Potent-C mixed with water. It contains B vitamins and the chemical CoQ10 – both of which bolster energy levels. Add an iron-rich snack like dried apricots to aid absorption.
Cost Potent-C, 65p per sachet

7pm: Mental massage

Coconut water

Post-gym dehydration can wreak havoc on your mental state, undoing the effects of your Potent-C pick up. “Coconut water hydrates you fast because its electrolyte balance is similar to body fluid, so is highly absorbable,” says Walker. Down a cup now for an evening of high spirits.
Cost Vita Coco, £4.18 fro 1 ltr

11pm: Happy night cap

Blackcurrant cordial

“Blackcurrants are rich in zinc, which boosts dopamine levels and regulate your mood,” says Hill. They also contain sleep-inducing magnesium. Drink it hot: research has found warm drinks improve outlook by 11%.
Cost Cordial, £4.30 for 50cl

[/quote]

Have I missed any???

What are some of you favorite mood boosting drinks that ACTUALLY WORK?

Leave your favorites in the comments.

Images provided by:

barenakedislam.wordpress.com

You're NOT Just Having A Bad Day: Warning signs that you may be depressed

May 22, 2012 by P. James Holland

You keep telling yourself that you are just in a slump…
But those slumps seem to be lasting longer and coming on more frequently.
Do you just continue and tell yourself all is well?
Do you think you will eventually just bounce back on your own?
Or is something greater going on that should warrant a more in depth look inside of you?
Many people can go through mild depression without ever even knowing about it. But this is something I hope you will not take to lightly.
I hope you do not have any of these symptoms as described by HELP GUIDE. In a perfect world this would just be another short “down period” and you will be back to normal in no time.
But only you can make this very distinction!
Please take the time to really think about these symptoms and causes and consider seeking out another (possibly professional) opinion.

Warning Signs Of Depression

[quote style=”boxed”]Are you depressed?[/quote]

[quote style=”boxed”]If you identify with several of the following signs and symptoms, and they just won’t go away, you may be suffering from clinical depression.

you can’t sleep or you sleep too much
you can’t concentrate or find that previously easy tasks are now difficult
you feel hopeless and helpless
you can’t control your negative thoughts, no matter how much you try
you have lost your appetite or you can’t stop eating
you are much more irritable, short-tempered, or aggressive than usual
you’re consuming more alcohol than normal or engaging in other reckless behavior
you have thoughts that life is not worth living (Seek help immediately if this is the case)

Signs and symptoms of depression

Depression varies from person to person, but there are some common signs and symptoms. It’s important to remember that these symptoms can be part of life’s normal lows. But the more symptoms you have, the stronger they are, and the longer they’ve lasted—the more likely it is that you’re dealing with depression. When these symptoms are overwhelming and disabling, that’s when it’s time to seek help.

Common signs and symptoms of depression

Feelings of helplessness and hopelessness. A bleak outlook—nothing will ever get better and there’s nothing you can do to improve your situation.
Loss of interest in daily activities. No interest in former hobbies, pastimes, social activities, or sex. You’ve lost your ability to feel joy and pleasure.
Appetite or weight changes. Significant weight loss or weight gain—a change of more than 5% of body weight in a month.
Sleep changes. Either insomnia, especially waking in the early hours of the morning, or oversleeping (also known as hypersomnia).
Anger or irritability. Feeling agitated, restless, or even violent. Your tolerance level is low, your temper short, and everything and everyone gets on your nerves.
Loss of energy. Feeling fatigued, sluggish, and physically drained. Your whole body may feel heavy, and even small tasks are exhausting or take longer to complete.
Self-loathing. Strong feelings of worthlessness or guilt. You harshly criticize yourself for perceived faults and mistakes.
Reckless behavior. You engage in escapist behavior such as substance abuse, compulsive gambling, reckless driving, or dangerous sports.
Concentration problems. Trouble focusing, making decisions, or remembering things.
Unexplained aches and pains. An increase in physical complaints such as headaches, back pain, aching muscles, and stomach pain.[/quote]

If you feel like you fall into ANY of these categories or you have maybe even the slightest doubt – You NEED to watch this video to start your process of recovering from what could be depression.

The 3 Simple Truths About Depression

[jwplayer file=’http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oJsXEFY17Mc&feature=youtube_gdata_player’]

Whatever it is you may be going through, please understand that you do not have to go through it alone.

If you think you have no one… YOU HAVE ME!

If at anytime you just want to talk you can contact me at anytime through the form below.

I answer all of my emails and all comments personally. Just specify you would like to chat privately and I will PERSONALLY CONTACT YOU!

[box type=”tick” size=”large” style=”rounded”]MY PROMISE:You will never have to go through anything alone again.[/box]

Sleep More, Lose Weight?!?! BEST DIET EVER!

May 3, 2012 by P. James Holland

Who says “the perfect diet” does not exist?
How about a diet that says sleep more and you will lose more weight?
Ummmm, I think I can stick to this one!
A study over at Annals of Internal Medicine went out to prove this fact in a not-so-recent study that was conducted… thus making me strictest dieter in my household!
[box] Sleep curtailment decreased the proportion of weight lost as fat by 55% (1.4 vs. 0.6 kg with 8.5 vs. 5.5 hours of sleep opportunity, respectively; P = 0.043) and increased the loss of fat-free body mass by 60% (1.5 vs. 2.4 kg; P = 0.002). This was accompanied by markers of enhanced neuroendocrine adaptation to caloric restriction, increased hunger, and a shift in relative substrate utilization toward oxidation of less fat.[/box]
What does this all mean? It seems as though the more sleep you get has a direct effect on your metabolism as well as you appetite!
This is something I, at first found hard to believe. Wouldn’t you think that the longer you sleep the hungrier you would be once you arose from your slumber?
But if that is not the case, then waking a hibernating bear is nowhere NEAR as dangerous as I though it would be! He should not want to eat for hours.
It really starts to make more sense when you think about it.
[box]There’s not a diet pill on the planet that could accomplish what sleep did in this study, which compared two groups of overweight non-smokers on calorie restricted diets for 14 days. One group clocked 8.5 hours of sleep per night, and the other logged 5.5 hours of sleep per night (which the authors point out is a “norm” for people in this day and age.) Both groups ate roughly 1,450 calories a day. After two weeks, the people who slept more lost more fat than the group who slept less. More than half of the weight loss during the 8.5 hours of sleep was fat versus only one quarter of the weight loss during the 5.5 hours of sleep. People literally burned fat while they slept.

Even more startling, the folks who slept less lost more muscle (60% more muscle was lost by the sleep-deprived group.) Those three hours of lost sleep caused a shift in metabolism that made the body want to preserve fat at the expense of muscle. And that’s not all that happened: When the researchers compared circulating blood levels of appetite-regulating hormones in the two groups they found those who slept for three fewer hours had produced more of the appetite stimulating hormone ghrelin. They woke up hungrier!
Most of us assume our bodies burn more calories when we are awake longer, but that’s not true. The metabolic rate is down-regulated with less sleep. Translation: When you sleep less, your body starts to burn calories at a slower rate to preserve energy. In the study, people burned on average 400 more calories by sleeping for 3 more hours–that’s an additional 2,800 calories burned in just one week. With less sleep, the body seeks to meet the increased metabolic needs of longer waking hours by shifting into a lower gear, so to speak, that burns fewer calories and less fat.
Bottom Line: If you want to burn fat, preserve muscle and wake up lesshungry when you are dieting, sleep more…8.5 hours a night to be exact.
[/box]

So next time you want to “kickstart” you new diet…. go to bed!
And when you start to get complaints that “all you do is sleep” you can smile and say “Its part of my new fitness regime”

[via Sleep More, Burn More Fat]